New England Aflame Part 4

Wow so I totally feel like Rip Van Winkle. Christmas is here and almost over. I'm sort of looking around wondering what just happened. With the crazy Christmas schedule(and those two words shouldn't go together), I have become detached from the spiritual aspect of it all. Between the shopping, the planing, the practice of christmas music, the recording of back tracks, the overtime at work for year end processing, I've spent no time reflecting or sitting with Jesus.

Perhaps a better person to identify with is Martha. See, I'm really a Mary of Bethany at heart, and to be honest, my soul languishes when I don't have time to sit and just be with Him.

The other night after Thursday music practice a few of us stayed and had some free/spontaneous worship time. IT WAS SOOOOOOO GOOD!! It felt so good and right. I get to do this every once in awhile and I was so blessed. I got to sing and prophesy over the space and place and really felt like I accomplished something in the spirit. It's not always like that, but this time I was very purposeful partially by accident and partially intentional. I was really stuck on Misty's phrase of "people get ready, Jesus is coming..." It was a joyful coming. He going to make Himself known more and in new ways and I'm just so excited about that.

Anyway, I didn't mean to get on this, but I guess it does kinda relate to what I did want to mention. It's the last part of the NEA conference.

Kevin Moffatt is well known for his prophetic art. While worship is going on, he will often create and release an art piece related to what is being revealed and released in worship.

As he was working on a piece at the conference, he was asked what the name of the piece was and if it was done. He said he thought it was done but that there was a small chance that it wasn't. He also said something like it wasn't what he set out to create but even if he made a mistake no one but him would know anyway. I don't remember the name of the piece, but that was irrelevant. It was what he said after that. He said the following:

"With my art, I am warring for the eye gate. I am warring for what God wants you to see. There is a sound and a color and I am willing to make a mistake in order for you to see and hear it."

As a musician, that really spoke to me. As I had a chance to settle down tonight and reflect on my lack of holiday revelation, Kevin's words came to me. It's also been our message series "Christmas Illusions" focusing on joy and what that means and the illusion of joy of lack of it and what joy really is.

The post is kinda skittery, as my thoughts are, but that's how it is tonight. It just seems to me that the Lord has been zeroing in on gettig us to see what is real and what isn't. The seen, tangible, physical things aren't reality. The couch I'm sitting on, this computer, my job, the money I have(or don't have) in the bank-that's the illusion. We've been made to think there's something real, something necessary. The only real thing at this moment for me, is the music I'm listening to that's opened the gateway from heaven to my living room and is allowing God's presence to fill the 970 square feet of the planet that I'm currently borrowing.

Stop and think about the real and the unreal. The known from the unknown, reality from illusion.

New England Aflame Part 3

So what does that look like for us over here? What do I do right now to move in this direction? I'm not 100% sure, but I do know it requires a radical change of current thought patterns. I need to reevaluate what I want versus what I actually need. Three questions I've been asking myself and they have been even more highlighted this weekend. The other questions have come as I have been processing the conference.

Where do I spend my time?
How do I spend my money?
What do I put in my mouth(fasting)?

I believe the answers to these questions really show our spiritual condition. There's a million reasons, including "practical" ones even given by well meaning Christians about why we can't do these things.

Am I willing to spend time in prayer when I could be doing other things? Prayer really is a waste of time in a worldly sense. It is sacrificing real things that need to be done. The house isn't as clean, the laundry piles up, things don't get done as often as they should. I am giving up practical, material things, to invest and spend time with the eternal ones.

Am I willing to give, not when I see a need, but when He tells me too? Regards of how valid I think it is? Money is one of the biggest hurdles and I believe, it is the one that will be the deciding factor in our level of faith and trust. Money in a practical, real, day to day living. Am I willing to give my utility money in the moment of need knowing that when the time comes my Father will provide?

Here's new question that I've been thinking about. Do I need really need to save hundreds of thousands of dollars for retirement when there are so many needs right now? Most people would freak at this question and consider even entertaining it as madness. And I know all the responses I would get about stewardship and being responsible, people misusing what you give them, how many times do you bail someone out(as many times as the Lord tells out whether it's once or a hundred)etc etc. But looking at the acts church, there was no retirement, no saving, no hording of the money. Everyone shared as they had. And I've heard "well that won't work because everyone would have to do that and most people won't..." So I'm going to follow the crowd and not going to do what's shown in the bible because the rest of the church isn't? Really? We give all our money to our churches, but are they caring for the orphan, the poor, and the widow or planning the next program or upgrade? Good intentions don't meet the need. Good intentions kill people-spiritually and physically.

Am I willing to fast when called to-giving up physical time and energy in order to create change and shift in the unseen realm? Like praying fasting takes energy and time. You have less energy and real things that you should be doing you can't. But again in the light of all eternity, does it really matter?

Am I willing to love with reckless abandon for the good and safety of myself? Am I able to step out pray for the healing of the sick and/or terminal or the raising of the dead, knowing that my Dad's going to back me up?

The light of eternity. That has been my prayer as of late. Lord give me You heart and let me see my time, money, and energy in the light of the eternal. At first that'll really wreck you day. It's foreign, it's strange, it's goes against everything that we've been taught to do as people, even in the church. We've come up with why we can't do something and then created doctrines and ideals around them in order to fortify ourselves and make it easy on ourselves.

Somewhere along the line we have reversed the first two commandments and made religions out of it. Our calling, our purpose is not to save the lost. It's really not. We are to love Him with the spirit of mary of bethany and the fire of John the baptist. It's hard enough to control or humanity and love Him with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength. It's no wonder why I can't do everything else too. When we have daily encounter with His love, we love, and out of that love flows love and desire to save to lost and it can't help but overflow-THAT'S evangelism. Taking care of the orphan, the poor, and the widow.

As I have tried lots of the prayer and little of fasting and money part, I'm feeling a release-and I didn't even know I was bound. There's a new freedom taking place that I didn't know existed. The freedom of not having to have all the answers, not having to have it all figured out. It's living in the place where the Spirit is. And where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.

New England Aflame Conference Part 2

Heidi also shared a story about how she was in China to speak at a conference. While she was there she found out through the news that part of Mozambique had flooded(think New Orleans but two or three times a year). She was burdened by the situation, but was thinking 'God, can't I just ignore this? I'm suppose to be at this conference, you've sent me here to minister and I can't think about this and the conference at the same time."

In the midst of her questioning, she heard God say "feed 100,000 people". She was like "what God?". Again He said "feed 100,000 people". Then she started to think "I don't have the money, I don't have the food, I don't have the resources". Again "feed 100,000 people". So she said "Ok Lord". She finished the China conference goes back, and through a series of something only God could work out, food and things that were needed were delivered.

Bringing the two things together(the parable and the China story) God wasn't asking her to figure out all the logistics. He just said "Go do it and I'll work out the rest". Heidi said if she had waited for the right time, or the money, or next June to plan the crusade it wouldn't matter because the people would have been dead. They needed what the needed NOW. Not in a month, not in a week, not yesterday, NOW.

So many times I think we don't do things because we think we need a blueprint for everything. We say we rely on Him, but we really don't. Proof is we have all our backup plans of B C and D in case He doesn't work it out. She said our question shouldn't be how do I do it, but what should I do. Then just go do it. She doesn't have a back up plan. There's just Jesus. If He doesn't show up, it doesn't work.

The Mosaic That Makes God Visible

So I know I said I would blog about the CT conference-but I just can't get away from this idea of the church and what we are called to be. For so many years I was in the church. Then I was wrecked by the church and I had to leave. I felt angry and betrayed. Eventually I realized that my fierce anger and resentment came from the answer I didn't want to face: I was alone and isolated. The church of Acts didn't exist. There was no "Ekklesia". There was no one to build me up or for me to build up. No spiritual exchange. No one close enough to have the courage to lovingly rebuke and hold me accountable when I needed it most.

Then Jesus stepped in and and He has begun to revolutionize the church. No longer does it look like it used to look. No longer does it sound the way it used to sound. It's a slow process, but people are learning to not only trust one another, but learning to be trustworthy. The kinds of people you can safely share things with without fear of them calling someone else to gossip..er...I mean..uhh..."pray".

This will change. This is changing. It must change. There is no alternative. Those that are changing are choosing life. Those that refuse to change are choosing death. Freedom and joy and life is being released. Our commonality is becoming Jesus. He is our only tie. He must be our only connection. The day of your ministry and my ministry is over. The days of denominations are over. The days of programs and ideals and methods and styles is over. We don't need another kind of program. We don't need another kind of service. We don't need another gimmick or the latest trick. We don't need to be relevant. We need Jesus. Nothing else matters. Together we must seek Jesus.

The Book says "If you lift Me(Jesus) up, I will draw all men unto me.". The problems with our churches are very simple. Our programs don't work because we're lifting something up other than Jesus-or lifting something up along with Jesus. When Jesus shows up, the building will be filed beyond capacity without our doing a thing. History has proved that time and time again. Either the Book is truth or it isn't.

Saving the lost is not our calling. Somewhere along the line we reversed the first two commandments and called it truth. We are to love Jesus with all our heart, mind, soul, and strength. That is our mission, that is our goal. When we are rooted and grounded in love, confident of who we are in Him, ministry comes automatically. It comes without guile and deceit and ulterior motive. It flows from a heart of truth and light, and not from a mind of darkness, fantasy, suspicion, and conspiracy.

Yet I digress. I encourage us to continue in the direction we are going! We're on our way! The heart of the Father is calling and we are answering!

Again I want to quote Henri J M Nouwen: With the section of his book entitled the same and this post. It again has to do with community and prayer:

"Community is like a large mosaic. Each little piece seems so insignificant. One piece bright red, another cold blue or dull green, another warm purple, another sharp yellow, another shining gold. Some look precious others ordinary. Some look valuble others worthless. Some look gaudy, others delicate.

As individual stones, we can do little with them except compare them and judge their beauty and value. when, however, all these little stones are brought together in one big mosaic portraying the face of Christ, who would ever question the importance of any one of them? If one of them, even the least spectacular one, is missing, the face is incomplete. Together in the one mosaic, each little stone is indispensable and makes a unique contribution to the glory of God.

That's community, a fellowship of little people who together make God visible in the world."

The church has spent so much time comparing stones. Pastors and worship leaders comparing their treasures, congregation members comparing their beauty and talent against one another, ministries secretly-or not so secretly-competing and comparing their gold and silver. Prophets one-upping each other, Apostles claiming ownership or originality of different "streams", and on and on it goes. The time of this has come to and end. The time of Jesus is once again here.

Let's come together and support one another without fear and rivalry. You need me and I need you. We can't do it alone.

The next time you gather together with your brothers and sisters, think of the mosaic.